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Welcome to
Lance Magazine

A multimedia dazzle-scape and cornucopious proliferation of spectacularity and resounding communicational explorosions that will insenserate you to magnificent occasional chuckles and mild amusement and there will be photos and for some reason my old poems and some other shit.

It’s better than it sounds actually. We’re going to change the world together. I’m just setting up the furniture right now. Feel free to make yourself at home.

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This is a Thing:

  • 2012-13 Wrap-Up, Part 3: Animal Stuff

    2012-13 Wrap-Up, Part 3: Animal Stuff

    In 2012-23, I seriously (re-)committed myself to helping animals......

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  • 2012-13 Year-End Wrap-up, Part 1: Web/Work Stuff

    2012-13 Year-End Wrap-up, Part 1: Web/Work Stuff

    (See also: Part 2, “Creative Stuff” and Part 3, “Animal Stuff”. All parts share this common intro…) When I think back on 2013, I see it mostly as a super-f...

    Read More
  • New Poems (?!)

    New Poems (?!)

    I don’t write poems at the velocity I used to…or maybe I should say I don’t finish poems at the rate I used to, or talk about them as much as I used to. But I do spit...

    Read More
  • New Porch Puppy Videos and Facebook Page

    New Porch Puppy Videos and Facebook Page

    The “Lake LA Porch Puppies” (previously mentioned here, here, and here) now have a Facebook page:     That’s going to serve as their home base from here on out...

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  • Are octopi the most amazing animals? (We may have to wait ’til they tell us.)

    Are octopi the most amazing animals? (We may have to wait ’til they tell us.)

    Prepare to have your mind blown re: octopi and other cephalopods. (Unless you’re already in the know.) Exhibit A is this article in Orion Magazine, which I read some time ago, and...

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  • Libertarianism vs Community? (Free Thoughts Podcast)

    Libertarianism vs Community? (Free Thoughts Podcast)

    In the debut episode of their Free Thoughts podcast, Aaron Ross Powell and Trevor Burrus from the Cato Institute do a really great job discussing (and debunking) the myth that libertari...

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  • Lake LA Porch Puppies YouTube Playlist

    Lake LA Porch Puppies YouTube Playlist

    I’ve been making lots of videos related to the “Lake LA Porch Puppies“–and there are more to come. I’ll be making adoption videos for each of the pups, and...

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  • Image Gallery: November Roses

    Image Gallery: November Roses

    ...

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  • Feeding a carrot to Golondrina

    Feeding a carrot to Golondrina

    It took me almost two weeks of trying in order to get a good “selfie” of me feeding a carrot to this neighborhood horse directly from my mouth. This is why I need a girlfrie...

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  • Lake LA Porch Puppy and Mom Fundraiser

    Lake LA Porch Puppy and Mom Fundraiser

    As I mentioned recently, last week I helped rescue a mom dog and her 5 pups, who were living under the porch of an abandoned building in my town. Now we’re holding a fundraiser to...

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  • Lake LA porch puppy rescue (VIDEO)

    Lake LA porch puppy rescue (VIDEO)

    I’ve been putting water and food out for the mom of these puppies since I discovered they were living under the porch of an abandoned building near downtown Lake Los Angeles. The...

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  • Mojo and Weirdo chewing on treats (animated gif)

    Mojo and Weirdo chewing on treats (animated gif)

    ...

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  • Five Variations on “What They Saw”

    Five Variations on “What They Saw”

    Here are 5 versions of a photo I took yesterday evening–which, unbeknownst to me at the time I was taking it, features a neighbor family that was standing atop the main butte in t...

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  • Talking about very serious issues, via text message

    Talking about very serious issues, via text message

    i think if u r considering suicide u may need to look in ur heart and c how many ppl luv u but if u r thinking about an abortion then u need to consider whether u r ready to accept the...

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  • Blast from the past photo: The Old Motorhomestead

    Blast from the past photo: The Old Motorhomestead

    For about 9 months in 2007-8, I lived here: The motorhome didn’t move. There was no plumbing, water, or septic. Power came from a generator which ate ~5 gallons of gas a day. Phon...

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From the Blog

If a tree gets played like a record, does it make a sound? (Yes)

“Dude…you ever notice that tree rings kinda look like grooves in a record?” “Dude! Whoa…totally!” (bong hit) “Dude…what if we built a thing that would p...

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High hopes for my new mic

Finally got what is probably the second-most anticipated and wished-for item I’ve ever bought*, the Blue Yeti USB microphone. It is genuinely a thing of beauty: As you can gather from the...

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Hulk and Xena and Arrow playing (animated gif)

Here’s a gif of Lake LA Porch Puppies Hulk, Xena, and Arrow, doing what they do…being adorable. See also: Hulk, Arrow, and Xena being cute together (17-second YouTube video taken moments a...

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Lucky Near-Misses Compilation Video (a.k.a. “Yikes!” x 50), or a Thought on Thankfulness

This is a fun/scary compilation of people barely avoiding catastrophic accidents. Aside from just being a rush to watch, I feel like it must be carrying a message about life in there too. I’ve h...

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2012-13 Wrap-Up, Part 3: Animal Stuff

In 2012-23, I seriously (re-)committed myself to helping animals......

Read More

2012-13 Wrap-up, Part 2: Creative Stuff

Apparently 2013 wasn’t quite the total zero that my reflex memory says it was. Because when I went to tally some of my tangible creative accomplishments, I came up with all the stuff below.......

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Comedians in Cars Getting Coffee: Louis CK

Do you ever avoid a TV show because you can tell it’s obviously going to be good, and you’re afraid of the time-suck and of making a new commitment? Jerry Seinfeld’s web series Comed...

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2012-13 Year-End Wrap-up, Part 1: Web/Work Stuff

(See also: Part 2, “Creative Stuff” and Part 3, “Animal Stuff”. All parts share this common intro…) When I think back on 2013, I see it mostly as a super-frustrating and...

Read More

New Poems (?!)

I don’t write poems at the velocity I used to…or maybe I should say I don’t finish poems at the rate I used to, or talk about them as much as I used to. But I do spit one out here or...

Read More

Features

The Not-So-Simple Life

Photos

OLYMPUS DIGITAL CAMERA

The Little Things

Poems

  • Slow Squirrel
    What's up, slow squirrel? Oh, now you're fast. I thought you were just going to stand there While...

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